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How else could it have been more obvious?

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Aug. 7th, 2009 | 12:00 am
mood: indescribableindescribable
music: Yeah Yeah Yeahs - Hysteric | Powered by Last.fm

Maybe I should have painted a target on myself.

It just hit me. Really, just now. I've had an inkling that I'd be moving for over a year now, since I began studying for the GRE. And I've known for sure that it'd be happening since February, and where I'd be going since April. But just now. 11 days before I go. After I've already thrown away or given away hundreds of pounds of my stuff, and after I've lined up five things I'm going to put on the curb in the morning and tell the neighborhood listserv that anyone can cart away. I even closed my Wachovia account today. Nothing.

I think the clincher was asking for a key to my new house from my future roommate. He responded to my email in less than 30 minutes, and it's in the mail. On the way. Not a going away function at work, not leaving my job or getting followup texts from co-workers asking the password to something, not a going away party with my friends, but this. I will have the key to this house in less than 11 days, and will start driving. And then I move into a new house. Where I won't know the quirks of the water heater, or which Kroger stocks better ice cream, or how I'm going to fit all of my stuff in a smaller bedroom (though Apartment Therapy can help with that latter). Or which of my roommates to confide in. Or anyone.

I'll figure it all out, and I do look forward to doing so as the great adventure of now, much more alive when floundering than comfortable. But.

What took me so long?

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Comments {2}

CrazyKidBen

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from: crazykidben
date: Aug. 7th, 2009 05:20 pm (UTC)
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I'm the same way, with things taking a while to really hit me, and generally it's the most random thing that ends up being the trigger. When I moved into my new apartment, the one where I live by myself, it didn't hit me until I had already completely moved out of the house I shared with two roommates and had been sleeping in the new place for a few days. It was when I dropped the key to the old house through the mail slot in its front door the following week. It was just like "that's it, new life."

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jonathan

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from: silverthief2
date: Aug. 7th, 2009 07:55 pm (UTC)
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Isn't life weird that way? I was thinking last night about all the stuff that will be different, primarily not having the house to myself. Not that it's bad, but it's going to take adjustment.

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